Writings

January 2026 Check-in

In which I attempt to hold myself accountable and end up musing on my relationship with productivity.

Since I introduced my yearly goals last post, and haven’t posted anything since, maybe an accountability check-in is in order. I’ve been busy! Productive! Yet I don’t feel like I accomplished much, so I wanted to recount what I did. I didn’t want to feel pressured to achieve any particular outcome, but perhaps I stayed too much in my comfort zone. Anyway, here it is, based on the vague goals from last time, which were...

Read more, especially fiction and fantasy

Because I want to write in this genre, I should get back into reading it. I read one fantasy book, The Sorceress and the Cygnet by Patricia A. McKillip. She’s one of my favourite authors and I prefer this length and type of book: short one-off fantasy stories. Actually, I found out it has a sequel, which I might read too, but honestly, this wasn’t my favourite of hers. It does have pretty magic but just didn’t draw me in as much as Alphabet of Thorn or Kingfisher. I’m aiming for at least 12 fiction books this year and haven’t picked the next one yet.

I also read a non-fiction book Bad Artist: Creating in a Productivity-Obsessed World. It’s an essay collection that seemed relevant to my situation. Two lines I highlighted are: “Excelling and desiring are very different qualities” and “Is there a form of trauma that comes from subverting one’s essence for decades?” Ponders.

I also enjoyed reading about the different authors’ creative processes. Some of them are scientists who note through-lines in their scientific and creative work: observing, attention to detail, experimentation and iteration. I’ve been trying to reconcile having both a rational side and artistic side, which sounds silly, but we’re often told it’s one or the other. But, not everyone fits in one of two boxes.

Cat sitting at a writing desk
Vesper helping

Continue writing blog and book

In January, I drafted a few blog posts and rewrote part of my novel. I didn’t post anything though, and I won’t be sharing my novel until it’s ready. What novel? It’s something I plotted out years ago. It doesn’t need to be good, just done at this point. It’s going very slowly. :)

With the blog, I started on a few different ideas, but mostly I’d been thinking about writing through my experience with burnout which I alluded to last time. I did multiple drafts totalling over 10,000 words on the subject. It’s still not something to share yet, but functioned as closure on that chapter for me. I came to some personal insights in the process, but struggling to put that into a format that might be informative or useful for others.

Draw and paint more

(and share more online again)

I have an idea of the type of artwork I want to move towards, but to ease into it, I thought why not do a daily drawing? I stuck with it for four weeks and changed my prompt theme each week to keep it fresh. Within a week, I’d already done more artwork than last year.

I’ve been sharing with friends and private Discord groups, but I’ll put a few of my faves here. One week was cats, another was tarot cards. (I’m not especially spiritual, but I like the symbolism of tarot artwork and have found it useful in self-reflection.)

Cat portait in graphite Cartoonish cat portrait sketch Stylized cats on a rug Iris flower with spiky metal halo Phoenix-looking dinosaur-like creature witnessing a meteor Girl napping on the forest floor, with crow

So far, I haven’t pushed my skills or practiced anything specific, just seeing where I was at. I’ve paused for now to use my daily creative time for other things.

Continue healthy habits from last year

This one slipped a little. I managed to plateau through the holidays and not overdo it on the baked goods and cheese plates, so that’s good. I always move less in Jan/Feb and this year was super cold. I have a walking pad, but it’s not the same.

I probably won’t include all these sections if I do more posts in this format, just being thorough!

I’ve applied for about a dozen jobs in the past few months, had three referrals and two recruiters. Three intro calls and one interview, no fit. Still waiting to hear back on the latest batch.

Stories of the product design job market continue to be dire, but there are also some signs of things picking up.

Miscellaneous

I have a few “bingo card” items to make or learn this year as I feel like.

Colorful yarn on a drop spindle
Lumpy handspun

Next?

I have too many ideas. Sometimes I get a singular focus, but sometimes I can imagine all the possibilities, and stall. I’m getting restless while looking for more steady work, but I’d just been getting in the groove of writing and creating regularly. Trying to refocus on career really distracts from less-related side projects. One path seems nearer to income, which I liked having.

On the other hand, what if I focused on learning something new, even if it’s not exactly related to my line of work, following my curiosity? What if I actually kept working on art and got good at it? If I really want x what would I do next? And what could I give up? Diversification is a risk-management strategy. But focused investment could pay off over time.

In this case, talking about where I put my limited energy, I believe the standard advice is to focus on one thing if you want to be great at it. There are also polymaths and multi-passionates who find success, and I think I may naturally be that type. I’m trying limit the amount of things I do at once. I don’t need to be the best at everything, I can let certain things lay fallow for a long time, and hobbies are allowed to just be fun.

If I sound too wrapped up in the language of capitalistic productivity, maybe -- it’s the way I best know how to describe wanting something then taking measured steps towards it. In reality, I’m being realistic and not putting too much pressure on myself. I’ve tried to break up with hustle culture rhetoric, but it sneaks in.

I’m also in a rather lucky position where I don’t have a lot of other responsibilities and am able-bodied and energetic enough to be able to focus on creativity. Maybe I feel guilty for not taking more advantage of that, but also guilty if I do.

Anyway, accountabili-blog, out.